You ever notice that everyone in a long term relationship makes it seem like they are a burden to their significant other, and that’s just how it should be. But why? It’s become a game of who has the most overbearing spouse and who is the most annoying to their spouse.
When I started dating my current boyfriend, there were no complaints. We were so full of happiness – still am – and admiration for one another. We could never think of a bad thing to say about each other.
When I was out with my friends and coworkers I would always feel as if I was bragging because my conversations were built around what Tyler and I did the past weekend or what he made me or what he bought me. There was never a moment where we weren’t building each other up. I was happier than ever to have the most supportive partner by my side and even happier to have someone that I could openly support and grow with.
But this subsequently made me feel like an outsider and like I wasn’t part of the group. Everyone was always complaining about their partner doing this, or making fun of their partner doing that. And whenever I would say how Tyler is amazing they would all look down on me as if they pitied me for being so young and naive.
It got to the point where whenever I would say something and I started to see their expressions turn I would quickly add a ‘but Tyler does this.’ Instantly there would be eye rolls and jeers and the ever present ‘men, am I right?’ I felt guilty but at least people didn’t hate me for having a loving relationship.
Then it hit me, I have a baller ass relationship. My boyfriend supports me, makes me laugh, holds me when I cry, orders me hoards of carbs when I’m stressed, and always has wine handy for when I’m in need of a drink. All together he makes me a better person. My stress an anxiety melt away when I open the door and he’s there ready to hug me. I should be proud to show my relationship off, it shouldn’t be hidden.
And no, this isn’t a flex. This is me telling us as a whole that we should leave the archaic relationship model behind. It shouldn’t be funny to annoy your significant other, you shouldn’t want to stay at the office to avoid them, and you shouldn’t fight about everything.
We’ve learned from generations before us that relationships are hard work, they’re not fun. And there is some truth to this, they are work but not hard work, rather fun work.
We don’t need to give in to the need to impress others with the idiotic thing our boyfriend did the other night.
This is just my way of saying, if you love your partner, show it. If there is no bad in your relationship, show it. And your relationship doesn’t need to be perfect, Tyler and I disagree on things but we come to a conclusion of what works best for us instead of ignoring each other until it disappears.
Show your relationship for what it is.
I’m so proud of my relationship, I’m proud of how much we’ve both grown, I’m proud of how much we have learned from each other, I’m proud of how we challenge each other, I’m proud of how we accept each other, and I’m proud of how we support each other.